Why are fish so good at watching their weight?
Because they have a lot of scales.
How does Darth Vader like his toast?
Why did the footballer hold his boot to his ear?
Which celebrity always had the most beautiful Christmas trees?
What does a jack-o-lantern like to read?
Did you hear about the mathematician who's afraid of negative numbers?
What did the two corncobs say to each other on January 1st?
Why didn't the cheese want to hang out with the knife?
Who is Pepto-Bismol's® favorite band?
Where do cats go on vacation?
Why couldn't the leopard play hide and seek?